LOOOOOOOOOOOONG DAY

OK ... this will be a stream of consciousness posting without regard to spelling or grammar ...excuse in advance.

Today was a long emotional day. Today one of my students came in to drop out. I am devastated!! I made him inform the class why and answer any questions. His logic was simply he was tired of school and preferred the street life. I asked what his plan was ... and he said he plans to continue stealing GPS systems and other accessories from cars .... I ended by telling him to make wise decisions for me if he did not desire to make them for himself.

Then, I had a DOE EMPLOYEE recommend to one of my students, who is married and has a child, that she discontinue school until her problems were worked out -- despite the fact she is already 19. I told her to ensure she made a sound decision ... keeping in mind her problems would probably not go away ... she must cope with them and better herself simultaneously. She expressed deep gratitude toward me for taking time to talk about it.

Next my fifth period asked me if I was leaving. I tried to dodge the question emotionally and literally. Then they hit me with the classic inner city reality that most teachers come and go. This hit me hard -- as many leave because of poor ability to manage students -- where as I love my kids and have few behavior problems in my classroom.

Then tonight at graduate school we reviewed our research proposals -- and I was appalled at some of the misconceptions/ unrealistic expectations that teachers have about this dwindling concept of family alongside student achievement. Also, I was reminded of why I decided to teach -- in that most of these teachers have no clue what these students go through at "home."

Also, why would you conduct research with no control groups or with no desire to add any additional information to the current body of scholarly research??

Nevertheless, I know I must move away from the "emergency room"/front lines to have the far-stretching impact that I desire to make.

In the Heights -- Broadway Show

Tonight we took students to see a Broadway Show!!! It was amazing :)

Juan Acevedo Wake/Funeral

I just finished viewing the body of my late student Juan Acevedo. {Typically, I would consider this a wake but everyone insist it's synonymous to a funeral here.} It was the most emotional moment thus far this school year .... as I observed countless students and few school officials pay respects and sob endlessly. I then looked into the casket to see a big kid who had not lived his life yet, but had likely seen more than most 60 year old adults.

It still pains me to know that he sat in my classroom; yet I was unable to save him from the streets. His sister informed me at the funeral that he talked about me and my class alot.... However, I know in the end, my time with my kids each day is limited ... and during that time I give "infinities" of effort to foster a life-long love of learning. It is also becoming more difficult as the year come closer to a close, knowing I will not return in September. Yet, I know in the long-term future my impact will have been vast. In closing, please ask yourself am I making a difference -- kids (young and old) are dying each day emotionally and physically)